today i stayed in bed until three because i didn't set my alarm because i really needed sleep, darn it. no excuses, i deserved all ten hours. i'm feeling a lot better. every time i get up the first ten seconds are extremely iffy, but i can walk, and i managed to get over to the grocery to drop off debi's prescriptions for her, so that was good. i'm so sore, though, and my right leg is a mess. dad was right, my right leg isn't exactly straight. usually doesn't make a difference. oh well, what can i do? oh! on the bright side, i have only one real blister. the rest chickened out. whoo!
well, so today was interesting. i had fun with debi attempting to restrain legend while she poured assorted liquids on him. the end result of this was that there was lots of water, mouthwash and dog hair on my legs, the pavement, and flying through the air. we did get legend cleaned off a bit, and i think debs got some of the neosporin on his cut, but who can tell?
'twas great fun, though. trying to get legend to sit still, and getting licked to death in the process. and debi crying, "straddle him! sit on him! aagh!" and me crying, "you think it's that easy?!" as i ran around in circles and got little accomplished.
well, so debs left to go stay with rob again, and i'm up for another lonely weekend. who boy, hose me down.
tonight was interesting. bad things happened in tribrunchma. i felt so sick to my stomach.... listening to someone's problems for an hour... i can't help him. we're in a bloody chat room. i just get emotionally overwrought. i seriously was having quite the upset stomach due to that... aiiee.
i've had too many ed courses--i was reacting to that situation mentally in a way that i've been trained to. i was analyzing the behaviour exhibited and mentally noting what factors of adolescence led to it, then i was noting the way in which it should be handled. only problem is that you can't handle it correctly in a chat room. it involves sympathy and listening and pushing the person toward finding help. you cannot pull off any sort of therapy in a chat room. no no no and no! all my instincts cry out, "let me help!" and i have no ability to do it in that situation.
well, seeing what this guy is going through makes me ever so much more certain that my own mind is doing well now. we all have issues, but i think i've been dealing with them well, and i feel healthy. i wouldn't have thought of that if not for this whole episode, so there's a positive to it. although if this sort of thing happened all the time i'd have six ulcers. oi, i'm not good at stress. really. it wreaks havoc on my body and mind. note to self: live a carefree life. =Þ
oi, i have about seven bug bites. four on my left forearm. it's driving me mad ever so slowly... and one on my neck. why?? why the neck? and one on my scalp!! aagh! apparently i'm tasty, it seems. *sigh*
well, so after things calmed down in irc we went on to discuss music. roup sent me this track off an electronic cd... the beginning is in french, and he wanted me to help translate. it took me five minutes to open the damned thing, since he couldn't dcc it in irc as a .wma file (which is what it was) for some reason . it defaulted to some text file when i got it, and i had to go fuddle with the extension, then dig out the stupid windows media player. yeah, i'm not too bright, it took me five minutes to figure that out. well, i'm just used to dealing with mpegs, which are much easier to handle, imo. too many geeky abbreviations in one paragraph. shoot me now.
well, so i got it finally and listened to it... it's sort of cool. i haven't figured out all of it, but the beginning says, "le silence.... la plus vide et la plus lourde.... (something that sounds like "whomp whomp....") je repète...." which translates to, "silence.... the emptiest and the heaviest....(whomp whomp....) i repeat" well, technically you can say that the adjectives go before silence in translation since that's how french works. "the emptiest and heaviest silence," he says. i think it's sort of a cool line, but i have no idea what the whomp whomp is doing there. it just sounds like a guy saying "whomp" in a nasal french accent. it's weird.
there are another bunch of phrases.. maybe two or three more, but i'm not getting all of them yet... "les miroirs" "ce qu'il veut faire" and "aurais bien?" are sort of floating around in there, but i can't get all the words. it makes me feel a bit better about my french that i pretty much understand, though... amazingly the french rap i listen to uses language that is way too complicated and sophisticated for me to understand offhand half the time. also a good bit uses argot, so i lose out there, too. but really, offhand what high school student knows "un soupir" (a sigh) or "prendre soin d'elle" (take care of her)? they have good use of language, and the awkward things one learns in high school, even in an ap class, don't begin to cover it. i thought i was just rather inept, but i suspect that it's not me.

Elle est à toi mais sache que tu la perdras
Si tu la laisse plantée là au lieu de prendre soin d'elle
Seule, tu as la foi, elle éveille chaque fois en toi
Des joies exceptionnelles quand seule tu t'occupes d'elle

she is yours, but know that you will lose her if you leave her there rather than caring for her. you're the one who has the opportunity. if only you spend time with her, she awakens exceptional joy in you .
man, i really can't translate well. i still have to say that it seems apparent to me why this is better than a sappy american song. also, it's always a plus to find songs in the rap and r&b genres that don't have "bitches" in the lyrics every five words or so. flagrant cursing is so silly. and nothing is worse than songs in which the artists tell you how great they are and how they're kicking their rhymes over and over again. if you were so damned good, you'd think of something else to talk about.
whatever i do when i get out of school, it had better involve either french or music. i seem to have no other skills left. those two have taken over my life. that's ok, though. i'm just really darned cultured. if only i know crud all about art. i'm so ignorant about that. i've always envied debi's knowledge in art. oh well, maybe some day.
debi was saying that she wants to compile a tome of knowledge. not just words, though, i gather. sort of the ultimate teaching tool. she wanted me to help her with a music part of it for birthday presents, plural, since this would take me a while.
she wants me to put down famous composers in each era, define each era, and have essential works all cultured people should know from each artist with a bit of detail on the piece. debi would do the same for classical literature and art. if we ever got this together, it would essentially be everything you'd need to know to be the most incredibly cultured person ever. or maybe just and idiot's guide to culture. ^_^
i still think it's a great idea.... right after i buy that mansion and make myself into the perfect hostess i'll start on my chapters, and soon i'll be the most perfect, cultured hostess ever. oh, and i'd better learn a few more languages, too.
i've always thought that if i would live forever, what i would do is spend the time making myself into the best human being possible. spend one hundred years learning martial arts and fencing and whatnot, then keep up and stay in shape for the rest of time. spend one hundred years on philosophy, one hundred on history, one hundred learning multiple languages... eventually i'd be uberhuman, or something, i suppose. i'd also be awfully unhappy, i suspect.
living forever has always struck me as a bad idea. maybe that's because the first official exposure to it that i had was "tuck everlasting," from fifth grade. in the book a bunch of people drank from a fountain of youth accidentally and they seem fairly unhappy with the deal. it's just endless drudgery. the mother never looks in a mirror, because she knows exactly what she has looked like day in day out for the past hundred years. they all have a routine that they stick with as a defensive measure. i don't remember all that much of it, but it was not a happy circumstance.
well, not that i'd have to worry about it. heh. i'm too silly for words. i wonder if we ever take advantage of the time we have, really. every moment of unhappiness could almost be considered to be wasted. well, maybe not, but boredom? really anyone should have enough to do never to be bored. i think boredom is related to laziness, really. honestly all the times when i'm bored, i should be practicing or composing or drawing or hiking.... i should be doing something of worth. i don't want to, though. i want to talk to people. yeah, there's a surprise. :) i'm so predictable.
well, anyhow, it's late and i should get to bed. i can almost walk normally now, and maybe tomorrow i'll be all better. i hope so, because i should really do the laundry before sunday. if not, i have no idea what i'll wear to work. i have no pants left. yes, laundry would be a good step. anyhow, goodnight.
posted by Unknown at 3:40 AM