i just thought to myself, "there are no words to express how i feel at the moment." then i stopped. wait, this is me. nothing stops me from talking. i'll find the words.
ah yes, here they are: GOD BLESS!!!
my mother just overturned her previous decision about utah. we made reservations tonight for the plane ticket, and i'm leaving this saturday. i'm staying until mid august. i'm going to be sane! i'm going to be happy! i'm going to frolic in the sun! i'm going to drip apple juice down my chin if i don't watch it. we don't multitask well over here in sandryland.
it was such a pain making the reservations. we tried to do it online, and everything took six years to load. damned modem. then we finally ended up having to call up instead and it took another six years to find any available return date. it took over an hour for the whole process. i think it was closer to an hour and a half. the whole time i was worried something would go horribly wrong. it's so hard to be patient in these situations. i was worried as all heck, and i had my mother breathing down my neck. eww, cheesy rhyme.
everything is fine though. last minute reservations mean that the flight times are a bit uncomfortable. (leaving jfk at 7:09--wake up at five? coming back on a red eye with a three hour layover, too. i'll get back to jfk at 6:25 am. ewww.) i don't care, though!
i'm so HAPPY!
the odd thing is that when i'm depressed i get all philosophical and i talk for hours, but when i'm BLOODY JUBILANT(!!!) i have nothing to say. i think i just revel in the moment, or something like that.
i guess that means that i feel i can't question or analyze joy. i think it's a relatively rarer emotion for me, and maybe i feel if i scrutinize it, i'll lose it. can't afford that. sadness, on the other hand, is good to analyze. yeah. makes me all nice and broody. i do think that i get something out of the analysis, though, so i think it's worthwhile.
this is so exciting. i'm going to have to plan everything out starting tomorrow, and i'll have to actually find somewhere to put all my crap from school, and darn it, i need to get kathryn's birthday present. i'll be oh so happy to do it, though. now i have a focus, something to look forward to. i have motivation.
i'm going to see my sister! i'm going to be, well, not free, but much closer. i feel like jumping up and dancing. ah heck, i can't. it's too late at night, and the tenant would be disturbed. i'll get to it later!
oh, you know, now i have twenty some odd books on my floor and about five days in which to read them. huh. wow, my mind takes even more tangents than usual when i'm excited. heck, i feel too stupid to actually concentrate and come up with anything of interest. i'm going to make it an early night and mentally scream and shout and dance while lying in bed so that i still don't get any darned sleep. WHOO!!
posted by Unknown at 11:09 PM